When I was on an elevator in an office building here in New York, it was either in the late seventies or early eighties, I rode with three other men. The one standing in front of me kept turning around to look at the two men standing in a corner. As soon as he got off on his floor, one of the men said to the other, "He must be a queer." Needless to say, he didn't use the word "queer" as a term of endearment. From then on the word "queer" has become cringeworthy.
I refrain from using it whenever possible because it's such an ugly word. Even dictionaries still describe it as offensive, as a pejorative. If the gay and lesbian community continue to embrace that word, they should also be willing to embrace "faggot," "bulldagger," "fairy," and "pansy." Like "nigger" and "kike," they are equally ugly, hateful, evil, and disparaging.
There are many highly educated gay men and lesbians. You would think someone within that segment of the gay and lesbian community could come up with terms that are more edifying and life-affirming. Trying to "reclaim" hurtful terms does not erase or sanitize their negative histories.
Note: This blog post originally appeared on my Facebook page on April 19, 2023. I've made a few minor changes.
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